Life’s a Comedy: 11 Funniest Jokes About Bars, Jobs, and Quirky Animals
Drink Down
A man typically orders two shots each day—one for himself and one for his distant brother. On a particular day, he requests only one. The bartender inquires, “Is your brother alright?” The man responds, “He’s well. I have stopped drinking.”
Penguin Parade
A truck driver transports 50 penguins. A police officer instructs, “Take them to the zoo!” The following day, they are on their way to the beach, as the penguins enjoyed their time at the zoo.
The Plasterer
A duck that can talk orders a beer and a sandwich every day. When presented with an opportunity to work at a circus, he questions, “Why would they require a plasterer?”
Slowpoke Centipede
A man acquires a centipede that can talk. After being overlooked, the centipede exclaims, “I’m putting on my shoes!”
Hell’s Handyman
An engineer in Hell is responsible for fixing everything. When God requests his return, the devil quips, “Where will you find a lawyer?”
Big-Time Lawyer
A lawyer pretends to be on an important call. The visitor? His phone technician.
Chick Magnet
A novice farmer consistently plants baby chicks either too deep or too far apart.
Bachelors
A man’s cookbook proves ineffective—he never begins with “a clean plate.”
Copy That?
An employee confuses a shredder for a copier, asking, “Where do the copies come out?”
Whoa, Amen!
A horse responds only to prayers, halting at the edge of a cliff when its rider shouts, “Amen.”
Nutty Natter
Overhearing compliments at a bar? It’s the complimentary peanuts that are speaking.
